cuke15's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- moo, love Today I gave Ashley a stuffed cow. I got Saturday school for my pants sagging. It's all cool though. Anyways, It's 5th Period. I got to see Ashley today. Thursday is our 3 week anniversary. But anyways, Last night I was talking to Stephanie on the phone and I said "I think that I love Ashley, atleast I know I have the potential too, and I know I want to love her" Stephanie said that was sweet and I shouldn't force myself. Then I got into my definition of love, which I will explain. I feel love is non-destructable. Love will always be there, in some form, if it is real love. Love is the everlonging desire to put someone elses happiness in front of your own, and I dont think that dies ever. I think that it is just a matter of trust. I know for sure that Laura, Shawn, Chris, Katie, My mom, and my brother love me. I know I love all of them plus *cough*Chrissy*cough*. I know that there is potential for love from Chrissy, I know that much, because I know I do love her, it's just not the other way, she doesn't love me (which means, sadly, she never did). That doesn't matter, because I am not in the mood to talk about that. Anna Shingler put "Anna is a princess" on my back today. It was cool she is a princess. She is one of the sweetest creatures to walk this earth, and she's a prep. That's OK though, she makes a good friend. Ashley said she is half nice and half not, and I knew that was understandable, I guess people are different to other people. I know that soon I will be in love with Ashley, probably before the 16th (our one month anniversary). I know that this place is a screwed up world, and I know things happen, but i'll serve my 2 detentions and my saturday school, and i'll feel my love, get my potential love, pray for the other love and get my strength. I know things will be the same, if not better. Because every day I get stronger. I know that I love Michelle and Kim also, as they love me. Those two are probably the strongest, because they care about me, and they trust me enough to care strongly about them. I know that it's not possessive or obsessive when I care to death though, that's just true love though. I know that a relationship can make it harder to become friends, but Michelle and I didn't love each other when we went out (as we said we did), but we grew love after we broke up. I know that I have enough trust in Ashley to grow love in a relationship, because we were good friends before hand. The part with Chrissy is I love her, but I don't think she ever got the chance to grow love with me. I grew it within the first 5 days I saw her. 14:15:13 - 2000-01-04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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